If you had told me ten years ago I would be homeschooling my children I would have thought you were crazy. Now, I didn’t have children ten years ago, so there’s that, but homeschooling was not on my radar – AT ALL! I didn’t know anyone that homeschooled. It was a completely foreign concept to me.
INNER CITY SCHOOL
About five months after Mark and I were married we moved to Denver, Colorado so that Mark could attend pharmacy school. I had just graduated in elementary education and was eager to put my knowledge into a career. While I waited for my teaching license to get approved in Colorado I got a job as a reading and writing specialist in an inner city Denver school. This was a completely eye-opening experience to me.
I was so discouraged by the negativity in the school. The level of poverty left me feeling empty. But perhaps even more startling for me was the level of disrespect that was shown by the students…to one another, to their teachers, and to school property. I couldn’t believe most of what was coming out of their mouths and that it was just accepted by teachers and others within the school.
I worked there for a mere six days. Which, I know, is barely anything. But, it left an impact. A powerful one. I had found out the weekend before I started this new job that we were pregnant with our first little one. Mark and I were ecstatic. But then I got sick. Really sick. And after only six days I had to leave my job because I just couldn’t do it in my condition. I ended up being diagnosed with hyperemesis gravidarum which essentially is a fancy way of saying I have severe nausea every moment of my pregnancies.
But my time at the school left me with some strong feelings. Maybe it was because I had just found out I was going to be a mother but I didn’t want my children to be in that atmosphere. There was a part of me that thought, “They could be a light to this place and their peers. They could show a better way.” But that’s a lot to put on a little kid.
My brief time at the school in Denver made me reflect on other experiences I had had in schools while getting my education. There were many, many wonderful ones. But I had encountered some other ones that just gave me a sick feeling, even still, looking back on them. I wanted there to be another way but I was clueless to any other options.
INTRODUCTION TO HOMESCHOOLING
That is, until I was able to meet some other women through my church and book club, that homeschooled. I became really interested in their way of life. It intrigued me. I remember coming home and telling Mark that if we decided to stay in Denver that we HAD to homeschool.
But we didn’t stay in Denver. After our four years there we moved and even though homeschooling still intrigued me I thought it was no longer necessary.
CONCERNS ABOUT KINDERGARTEN
We bounced around a little after graduation and then finally ended up living in a small town on the Utah/Idaho border. We loved living there. But as the time to register Jacob for school came around I just didn’t feel good about it. So I delayed.
Since we lived in a rural area, the school was only Monday – Thursday, with Fridays off. This, I believe, is mostly to help with transportation costs. So since it is only four days a week, the kids are in school REALLY long. Jacob would have gotten on the bus at 6:50 in the morning and not come home until 4:00. This just sounded crazy to me. That is such a long day, especially for a five year old kindergartner!
Jacob loved learning {and still does!}. But his personality, I have no doubt, would have really struggled in that environment. He would have shut down and I really believe it would have greatly affected his attitude about learning. But, again, I was left feeling like there was no other option.
HOMESCHOOLING “INCEPTION”
Then I had, what I like to call an “Inception” experience {you’ve seen the Leonardo DiCaprio movie, right?}. Anyway, one morning after Mark had gone to work, I just had the idea come into my head that we should homeschool. And the idea EXPLODED in my head. I probably didn’t have a very good “Mom Day” with my kids and pretty much put on movies while I devoured every pro and con article I could find on homeschooling. By the end of the day, I knew that’s what we needed to do.
That night, I remember I was really nervous to tell Mark about my new idea. I knew he wasn’t going to be expecting it AT ALL and I didn’t know what he would think. But I distinctly remember sitting down with him on our back porch, watching our kids play and talking it all over and feeling SO GOOD about it.
Mark, in true Mark fashion, finally concluded that if I was willing and wanting to make that sacrifice for the kids that he would support me 100%. But, ultimately, the decision was mine. We both decided to pray about it some more and it was one of those special experiences with prayer where I felt an instant confirmation that that was what we were supposed to do. Mark felt the same. And that feeling has never left us.
FIRST-TIMER MISTAKES
For some silly reason, I don’t even really know why, but I felt like we had to start “school” the same time they were starting school locally. Unfortunately, we made the decision to homeschool three weeks before school was about to start. I had no idea what I was doing, what “style” I wanted our homeschool to be like, or who this lady called Charlotte Mason was that I kept hearing about. It was completely overwhelming.
I researched curriculum for one night only {please don’t do what I did!} and ordered. We got it, I prepped everything, and we began homeschooling the same day as our local school.
Those first few days were weird. There were definitely some really great things but it definitely took us some time to find our groove. Sarah was two and Benjamin was eight months old when we started and I had no idea how to navigate things between the three of them.
We ended up giving up ALL of our curriculum we started with within a month or two and eventually have found things that we LOVE. But it still takes some trial and error.
And here we are, nearing the end of our second year homeschooling and I am amazed at how much we have grown. Things get adapted when they need to but learning is truly a joy. I have no doubt in my mind that this is the path our family is supposed to be on. And that is an amazing feeling.
“US” AGAINST “THEM”
One thing I remember noticing that very first day I was researching homeschooling is sometimes I feel like there is an “us against them” feeling. That there are people who homeschool and people who public school and there is this negative feeling between the two. I have never liked that and I hope that I never give off that vibe.
Each family is unique. Every family is full of different personalities, challenges and beliefs. What works for my family is not necessarily going to be what works for your family. AND THAT’S OKAY!
FINAL THOUGHTS
Homeschooling for us has been, and I believe, will continue to be a great source of happiness for our family. I love it and my kids love it. I feel like I have gotten to know my children in different ways taking on this role. I love that learning has become more of a lifestyle for us {even though I do thrive on a schedule!}. I love having the freedom to move at each of my children’s own pace and to follow their passions. I love being able to travel and have experiences throughout the year and don’t have the pressure of “missing school”. And I truly do love being with my children all day, every day {well…most of the time}.
Our journey to homeschooling was an unexpected one. But if there is one thing in life I have learned, it is that my plan is not the only one. Sometimes the Lord has other plans for us and for our families and we just need to trust in Him – whatever that is.
